Holidays usually invite us to think about rest, leisure time or even fun and new stimulating experiences.
However, not all benefits; For some families and couples, this change in habits and spending a lot more time together can escalate conflicts. Therefore, in this article We will do a brief review of the ways in which couples therapy helps to overcome the conflicts that arise during the vacation period..
How can couples therapy help you?
As its name suggests, couples therapy consists of carrying out evaluation and intervention tasks to solve relational problems that are affecting a marriage or courtship. It is a form of psychological intervention organized in several weekly sessions to which both members of the couple must attend, and which lasts a few months.
Conflict resolution is one of the pillars of this type of therapy, and is not limited to what happens during meetings with the psychologist or psychologist; part of our job as behavioral science professionals is to “train” people in skills like managing arguments, communicating properly, regulating frustration and anger, and more.
In other words, going to couples therapy does not mean having the arbitration of a psychologist who will help resolve discussions during the duration of the session; it also teaches how to internalize and apply these skills at home, between sessions and after the counseling process is complete.
How does couples therapy help to overcome the conflicts that appear during the holidays?
In couples therapy, personalized attention is always offered and adapted to each case, and that is why not always all effective techniques and strategies are applied to help overcome conflict; only those necessary according to what has been seen in the evaluation phase.
That said, let’s see what are some of the most useful and used resources in couples therapy to help people who argue too much or do not know how to resolve their conflicts of interest.
1. It teaches you to detect the material causes of arguments
Many times, when arguing, We tend to take for granted that the problem is in the other person’s way of being, as if the cause of the problem was something that has spontaneously arisen in his mind.
However, in most cases there are elements of the environment or the situation that cause at least in part this conflict, and make it easy to come up over and over again in conversations.
In couples therapy, people are helped to attend to these signs that something may be influencing from the context, and to take this into account (regardless of whether or not it serves to excuse someone’s behavior).
2. Helps improve anger management skills
The ability to channel anger and frustration It is key to managing relationships well. Therefore, this is often one of the areas of intervention in couples therapy.
3. It allows to enhance assertiveness
Many conflicts arise as a result of not having a good level of assertiveness, that is, the ability to say what is necessary at the right time, despite the fact that it may be uncomfortable or that it may feel bad, trying to adjust the message to what we know about the other person, showing empathy.
Sometimes, there is a tendency not to want to go through that bad drink and the important thing that must be communicated is hidden, so that sooner or later it “explodes” causing arguments and unpleasant surprises.
4. Helps you combine your individuality with life as a couple
Holidays are a period in which it is normal for everyone to want to be able to dedicate themselves to what they like. Therefore, knowing how to negotiate times and activities is essential to have a healthy relationship.
5. Train in the use of active listening
Secondly, it is essential both to really listen and to make it known that we really listen.
Showing the other person that what they say has value has a great effect on maintaining that emotional bond. For this reason, couples therapy is taught to follow the principles of active listening.
6. Teaches to make a fair distribution of activities
Finally, another of the most relevant factors to prevent and manage conflicts has to do with not overloading one of the people in the relationship.
Achieving a balance of obligations and responsibilities has a very positive impact on physical and mental health.